Parenting at times seems so much like a bunch of guesswork. Sure, we've taken classes and formulated our ideas of how we want to parent (allow little or no tv but lots of reading, be involved in their school & sports, encourage good behavior, correct for bad...). But more often than not we find ourselves in that grey area (tv during illness? is tattling always "bad"?). And so it seems hard to gauge whether we're doing a good job or not as parents. "You're the best mom in the whole wide world" lets me know what my kids think (and oh, am I so very grateful to hear those words because they often come when I feel less-than-deserving). And compliments from strangers when we're out in public seem to second that. But...
There's all the day to day in's and out's. It's having to do the job of counselor, mediator, accountant, boss, and nurse, without any qualifications for any of them, that I get hung up on. Many times my husband looks at a situation ('cuz many times that's what we have in our house - "situations") and has a different take. Which makes me glad for a partner in this, but also makes me wonder about all the decisions I make (and possibly screw up) while he's gone.
Today though. Today I got something right. You see, yesterday and today our Timid Daughter awoke with pain in her calves. And yesterday she managed to hobble off to school. But this morning she crawled to my room to ask for help because it was too painful to even stand. So I trundled her back to bed with some ibuprofen, then later woke her for breakfast (and carried her down to it) and afterwards put her in a warm bath. After calling her in sick at school I got a heating pad going under her legs while we waited to hear from the pediatrician. Thankfully the pediatrician saw us right away. The diagnosis: myositis (inflamation of the muscles) caused by a virus she had over the weekend. And the blessed doctor prescribed (get this): ibuprofen three times a day, warm baths, and heat applications to her legs.
In my mind I was pumping my arms up and down saying, "Yes! Yes!". For once my instincts proved right. So do you think I'll trust myself any better when the next dilemma comes in...oh, a couple of hours?
Tuesday, March 04, 2008
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4 musings:
Congratulations. :) But it did make me sad to hear of her pain.
Yeah, we moms do get it right more often than we think. ;) I sometimes wonder why we second-guess ourselves so much. I don't see dads do that nearly as often. They make their best decision and roll with it. (Or maybe they're just better at hiding their self-doubt.) We moms wring our hands and pace and mutter. And then often end up doing what we first thought was best anyway. :)
-bm
Oh, good mom! Don't you love it when that happens? (Not the pain, of course, but the getting it right.)
In other news, Twin A. dropped last night. I feel like a sitting duck!!
LL- thanks. The pain is under control and she's being a real trooper about it.
BM-"We moms wring our hands and pace and mutter". You captured it well. And what is it with dads being so assured when we moms are the ones who supposedly have "instinct"?
LM-Run. Right now. Run very far away.
Sorry to hear that. I'll be praying you dodge it and A gets over it quickly.
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